Flowing Personality

"It is through weakness that we become strong. Every experience is a lesson that makes us better, wiser, and stronger."- Complete Works of Swami Vivekananda

The human experience is a tapestry woven with intricate threads of experiences, emotions, and challenges. We are often led to believe that our personality, like the ink on a finished painting, is fixed and unchanging. But my own journey, marked by both soaring triumphs and crushing setbacks, has revealed a truth that contradicts this static view: personality is not a rigid mold, but a fluid and ever-evolving river.

As Carl Jung, the renowned psychiatrist, famously stated: "The only true voyage of discovery is not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes." Jung, 1916. It is through the lens of these "new eyes" that I discovered the dynamic nature of personality.

My story began with a seemingly preordained script. I was introverted, prone to emotional expression, and constantly grappling with loneliness despite being surrounded by love. Stepping outside my comfort zone felt like navigating a minefield, every misstep triggering feelings of isolation and inadequacy.

Then, life dealt a series of blows. Painful experiences and challenging circumstances shattered the foundation of my perceived personality. Each day started with the sting of fresh tears, each failure chipping away at my self-image and achievements. I plummeted from the peak of success to the depths of despair, experiencing rock bottom not once, but twice within a tumultuous two-year period.

Depression, a struggling career, and a maelstrom of family and financial difficulties threatened to consume me. Yet, within this crucible of pain, something remarkable happened. I began to rebuild.

This is where the traditional understanding of personality crumbles. Facing these adversities, I discovered that my "fixed" personality wasn't a monolith, but a dynamic construct constantly shaped by the interplay of environment, experience, and my perspective on both.

As William James, another influential psychologist, wrote: "The greatest discovery of my generation is that a human being can alter his life by altering his attitude of mind." James, 1902. Surrounding myself with positive individuals who radiated an infectious passion for life became a potent antidote to negativity. I realized that life is inherently unpredictable, and the beauty lies in embracing both the sunshine and the storms. Happiness and sadness are not opposing forces, but complementary aspects of the human experience. Heartbreak and failure, though painful, became stepping stones to a deeper understanding of life's preciousness.

This profound transformation ignited a fire within me. I devoured books on spirituality, self-help, psychology, and even neuroscience, each offering a unique lens to understand the intricate workings of the mind and the fascinating ways it responds to setbacks.

Through relentless exploration and observation, I witnessed how our minds, in their ingenious yet sometimes mischievous ways, can alter our belief systems and values – systems we once believed to be unshakeable. As Neuroscientist Michael Merzenich explains, "The brain is not a static organ—it is constantly changing and adapting as a result of experience." Merzenich,2004.

It was this realization that sparked the desire to share my story, not as a self-indulgent narrative, but as a testament to the dynamic nature of personality. This blog is an invitation to embark on a journey of self-discovery, to challenge the notion of a fixed personality, and to embrace the transformative power of experience and perspective.

Therefore, instead of clinging to a fixed notion of ourselves, we should embrace the fluidity of our personalities. Like a river constantly shaping its course, our experiences continually influence our beliefs, values, and ultimately, who we become. By acknowledging and learning from life's tapestry, both positive and negative, we have the power to navigate the ever-flowing river of our personalities with resilience, wisdom, and an open heart.

Remember, you are not defined by your past experiences, but rather by your ongoing journey of growth and self-discovery. So, embrace the flow, learn from your experiences, and embark on a continuous voyage of self-discovery with "new eyes."

The key to living life with passion and energy lies in embracing the flow of experiences. It isn't about passively accepting everything life throws at us, but about actively engaging in the journey, acknowledging both the sunshine and the storms.

Gautama Buddha: "Our experiences shape who we are, but we need not be defined by them." Itivuttaka

While acknowledging the impact of negative experiences, it's crucial to remember the power of a positive attitude. Surrounding yourself with positive individuals who radiate an infectious passion for life can be a potent antidote to negativity. A positive outlook doesn't mean ignoring challenges, but rather approaching them with resilience, optimism, and an unwavering belief in one's ability to overcome obstacles.

While learning from others' experiences can be valuable, it's vital to remember that your journey is uniquely yours. Don't let someone else's perception dictate your approach to life. As Virginia Woolf beautifully expressed, "One cannot think well, love well, sleep well, if one has not first dined well." Woolf, 1929. Nurture yourself, explore your own path, and discover what brings you joy and fulfillment. Imagine learning to ride a bicycle. The initial attempts might be clumsy, fraught with wobbly rides and inevitable falls. Yet, the fear of falling shouldn't deter you from embarking on this journey. As you persevere, the falls become temporary setbacks, and the joy of finally mastering the skill is truly exhilarating. This experience highlights the essence of embracing the flow. Challenges and setbacks are inevitable, but the rewards of growth and self-discovery are ultimately worth the effort.

Life is a continuous journey of learning and evolving. As we navigate the ever-flowing river of experience, our personalities will inevitably change and reshape, reflecting our evolving sense of self. Embrace the flow, cultivate a positive attitude, surround yourself with good company, and embark on your own unique journey of self-discovery. Remember, as Nelson Mandela powerfully stated, "It always seems impossible until it's done.". So, step onto your own bicycle, embrace the challenges, and enjoy the ride!